Bob died Friday night (2/27/2009) at 11:55 PM.
February was a very crappy month.
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Please read quietly - Mama is resting
Bob decided to get back to death. He's again exhibiting "Medically Appropriate Symptoms" so can stay in the hospital for little longer.
If we may: The state of death and dying in NY is abhorrent. People die. It's a painful process for all involved. Why are there no local free standing hospice facilities? Rumors bound that they exist in he Western part of the state, but here in the Capital Region of NY, there is NOTHING.
So the Bob status. He's medicated heavily. He was seeing people that weren't there and pulling out his own hair. In a more comical moment, he "told off" the nurse that taped down his feeding tube (he had tried to pull it out). He can't speak, but his eyes cleared, his face became cross, and he made a very definite motion with his hand to say "Stop".
Moments like that kill MamaV's soul just a little.
If we may: The state of death and dying in NY is abhorrent. People die. It's a painful process for all involved. Why are there no local free standing hospice facilities? Rumors bound that they exist in he Western part of the state, but here in the Capital Region of NY, there is NOTHING.
So the Bob status. He's medicated heavily. He was seeing people that weren't there and pulling out his own hair. In a more comical moment, he "told off" the nurse that taped down his feeding tube (he had tried to pull it out). He can't speak, but his eyes cleared, his face became cross, and he made a very definite motion with his hand to say "Stop".
Moments like that kill MamaV's soul just a little.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Bend over and appease the insurance gods...
Hi folks. MamaV is a little...erm...infuriated right now. We'll try to translate.
Bob can't stay in the hospital. Because he's not dying correctly. He's hanging on and comforting his family in spite of the fact that he's on little liquid and no nutrients. So the insurance company says he needs to leave the hospital. There's nice dumpster over behind the ER. Maybe that will suffice?
Actually,MamaV and Mama's Mama will bring Bob home. It's going to suck, because MamaV is NOT a very compassionate woman, but she's on Bob's side right now.
We also witnessed a touching moment today. Bob was alternately checking his wrist (Mama thinks he's checking his watch) and answering an invisible phone. But then he looked at MamaV. She thought it was the pink and purple shirt, but he grabbed her wrist in a death grip (the man has an insane amount of strength!) and pulled her closer. MamaV sat on the edge of the bed and he proceeded to touch her hair and face. It was touching, tender, and absolutely heartbreaking.
Bob can't stay in the hospital. Because he's not dying correctly. He's hanging on and comforting his family in spite of the fact that he's on little liquid and no nutrients. So the insurance company says he needs to leave the hospital. There's nice dumpster over behind the ER. Maybe that will suffice?
Actually,MamaV and Mama's Mama will bring Bob home. It's going to suck, because MamaV is NOT a very compassionate woman, but she's on Bob's side right now.
We also witnessed a touching moment today. Bob was alternately checking his wrist (Mama thinks he's checking his watch) and answering an invisible phone. But then he looked at MamaV. She thought it was the pink and purple shirt, but he grabbed her wrist in a death grip (the man has an insane amount of strength!) and pulled her closer. MamaV sat on the edge of the bed and he proceeded to touch her hair and face. It was touching, tender, and absolutely heartbreaking.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Update on MamaV
MamaV is really, really stressed out. We know..."Duh". She's spent this week trying to work her full time job, take care of her kids (they were on school break), and spend time with her Mom and Dad. We think she really needs a nice vacation after all this. We also know it won't happen so we'll do our best to get her some soaping time.
Bob is on a constant morphine drip. Clinically, there's maybe 2 weeks left.
Bob is on a constant morphine drip. Clinically, there's maybe 2 weeks left.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Stroke Rollercoaster Loops-the-loop
After the elation of Sunday, things have taken a definite turn the other way. Bob was transferred to a rehab facility yesterday afternoon (2/17/2009) only to be shipped right back to the ER. A fresh bleed was discovered. Nobody knows when it started, but it's completed the damage of the original stroke.
MamaV is struggling to remember the man that loves camping and boating. The man that loved finding puppies and helping when someone was sad.
MamaV is struggling to remember the man that loves camping and boating. The man that loved finding puppies and helping when someone was sad.
So please, if you have a chance today, please do something kind for another person.
Monday, February 16, 2009
Good News!
Bob spoke yesterday (2/15/09). Mama cried like a little girl. We're not teasing her because it choked us up a little, too. Luckily, PapaV was there to step in for us. We think he's getting a lump of coal next Christmas and that would be nice.
So, massive stroke on 2/1, coma 2/2 - 2/4, ICU up to now with constant reminders from the neuro team that Bob would never speak, swallow. or recognize the family again. Bob is a tough old guy and we're pulling for him.
So, massive stroke on 2/1, coma 2/2 - 2/4, ICU up to now with constant reminders from the neuro team that Bob would never speak, swallow. or recognize the family again. Bob is a tough old guy and we're pulling for him.
Friday, February 13, 2009
MamaV Downer
MamaV tried to update yesterday, but doesn't quite grasp that it's not a dictation machine. Bless her heart.
The stroke rollercoaster was holding steady for a few days there. Not too hopeful, but not the despair of last week. It's dipping a little. Mama's Daddy (Bob) was gearing up to have his breathing tube removed so he could do all that work on his own. Then someone realized he kind of needed to keep the tube until a feeding tube could be surgically inserted. Duh. So it's been 2 days of limbo. But the added work that comes with breathing has meant the lucid moments are fewer and farther between. Maybe Bob just can't get the hang of Thursday. Mama had that issue for a while. Is that sort of thing genetic?
MamaV really appreciates the calls, cards, and kind words. She may choke up and make some strangled sounds, but she's really saying "Thank you".
The stroke rollercoaster was holding steady for a few days there. Not too hopeful, but not the despair of last week. It's dipping a little. Mama's Daddy (Bob) was gearing up to have his breathing tube removed so he could do all that work on his own. Then someone realized he kind of needed to keep the tube until a feeding tube could be surgically inserted. Duh. So it's been 2 days of limbo. But the added work that comes with breathing has meant the lucid moments are fewer and farther between. Maybe Bob just can't get the hang of Thursday. Mama had that issue for a while. Is that sort of thing genetic?
MamaV really appreciates the calls, cards, and kind words. She may choke up and make some strangled sounds, but she's really saying "Thank you".
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